Conquered

The Conquered

I came at first cry
Licking my lip
I came at first step
Watching you trip
I came at first word
Whispering, “slip”
I came at first choice
And saw Him unseated
I am death
And I am defeated

I watched you grow confidant
And helped you fall
I watched you get up
And helped build your wall
I watched you dream big
And made you small
I watched you search out
And made you conceited
I am death
And I am defeated

Then came Love
And made your knees fall
Then came Mercy
And tore down your wall
Then came Grace
And made me small
Then came the Sword
The message repeated
I am death
And I am defeated

I watched you see hope
And licked my lip
I watched you walk straighter
And begged you to trip
I watched you understand Love
And wished you’d slip
I watched your last choice
And saw me unseated
I am death
And I am defeated

For Wesley Phillip Entiger who was my adopted Grandfather and who passed away last week. This was written by request and reluctantly I did, but rather than being tolerable, God gave me one of my favorite works I've done, because its about him, telling the greatest story in the world that was played out in Mr. E's last years. This guy at age 79 walked into our church an athiest and was completely transformed by his love for Jesus, completely. Ask anyone. I love him very much and can't wait to go party with him and Jesus one day.

Beautiful

“Light of the world you stepped down into darkness, opened my eyes let me see, beauty that made this heart adore you, hope of a life spent with thee.”

We sang this song in church and as I sang the words I thought of the word beauty. I love the word, but I have yet to be able to fully know why. I have theories and thoughts on of course (previous post “Words”). But this song says that “You (God) opened my eyes and let me see, beauty, that made this heart adore You.” God let me see beauty. He has defined it, because He created it. We are fascinated with it because we came from it.

Psalm 27:4- “One thing I have asked from the Lord, that I will seek; that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the Lord, and to meditate in His temple.”
Psalms 50 says that because God dwells in Zion it is the perfection of beauty.

We are apparently called to pursue beauty, the Author of beauty. We pursue our version of beauty in ourselves, and in others, but we pursue it because we have a God shaped vacuum in our lives. We try to fill it with the easy parts of God, like beauty, but if we take anything away from God it becomes distorted. The same thing happens when take beauty apart from the Creator of it, we twist it. It mocks the One who gave it to us, but even still we pursue this fake beauty and are continually satisfied by it. However, when we are allowed a glimpse of true beauty, wherever that may be, it takes our breath away. It doesn’t matter if we are walking with God or not, if he allows you to see even a fraction of His beauty, in a sunset or in a child, or in anything else, it is indelible, and awe-inspiring. I think its one of the ways He draws His children to himself, lost and found.

The amazing thing happens as you walk with God and your relationship grows and you get farther and farther into the reality of God, you can start to see His beauty and the kind we pursued before gets more and more shallow and dissatisfactory. It so much more intense than a “Shallow Hal” spell or whatnot, we don’t see supermodels in everyone, we see something much greater. So much greater that even to call it beautiful is to cheapen it.

It’s not just in seeing beauty in a person or an object; it’s seeing it in situations. You can see beauty in situation that are beyond your own control, it is there because God takes control and you know that you are not strong enough and it is beautiful.

You can see it when someone you love dies and suddenly you are all together, surrounded by a “cloud of witnesses” united, if even far apart, fighting grief and hardships, and its beautiful.

Beautiful is more than a more poetic synonym for attractive. It is a description of God, and as I make God more and more my life, the more and beautiful my life gets. Not me, but my attitudes, my thoughts, my words, the more they are surrendered to God, the more they become beautiful. I want to be the most beautiful woman I can possibly be, not because I am the closest to a synonym of attractive I can be, but because I am closest to God as I can be, because that’s when life truly becomes beautiful. And its more than poetic, it’s a melody that sings over my life, in darkness and light; calm and storm.

"And on the road to beautiful...my seasons always changeBut my life is spent on loving You. To know You in Your power and pain." -Charlie Hall

Unhindered

The melody of your beautiful love
Soars through the night
Dancing in the glory of the stars
Brightening the splendor of the moon
Stealing my breath away

Sitting in the dark, torn
Between racing after your song
Following to the highest mountain of its aria
Or
To sit and let you embrace life,
Unhindered

The longer I sit, the farther you go
The more my soul grows dead
Ash floats like grey snow,
Laying hard on my heart
Suffocating it's beat

You dance near
The closeness of your being lightens my load
You sweep me up
Out of the ashes my soul arises
My heart beats,
Unhindered

To the ends of the earth
To the far reaches of the heavens
Our phoenix soars
Skimming the water
Capping the mountains

Through the rain
Through the wind
Through the dark
Through the light
Our dance still flies,
Unhindered

Away we go.